Sunday, April 26, 2009

Shoot the messenger

Recently, I've discussed with several people the tendency for others to blame me personally for the things I've discovered. Others I've spoken with have mentioned how others have blamed them as well for the things they have studied and shared with loved ones. For example, one fellow explained that he studied the Mountain Meadows Massacre, and that he was surprised at what he had found. When he shared his discovery with a church leader, the church leader asked him if he had thought about what effect this research would have on his family.

When I first shared my 'research' with those close to me, their first reaction was to blame me as well. No matter how hard I tried to explain that I didn't create, write, or influence these events in any way, but was merely reporting about them, blame still fell upon me for uncovering them, or discussing them. It's as if a silent pact had been made to repress these things and I had broken the pact, betrayed the community by discovering these unfortunate truths.

I'm reminded of Charles Dicken's 'A Christmas Carol' when Mr. Scrooge is visited by the ghost of christmas past. After several fond memories, the spirit begins to lead Mr. Scrooge to the day when his relationship with Belle was severed. "Please spirit, do not show me these memories. Have you no pity?' To which the spirit replied, 'These are the visions of things gone past. That they are what they are, do not blame me.'

To this reply, Mr. Scrooge could say nothing, and remained silent to watch the vision of the past. It was only by looking back at the past, feeling of the pain of that mistake that Mr. Scrooge could hope to reform his life and live a full future.

When Galileo dared to observe the moons of Jupiter and ponder a heliocentric universe as opposed to geocentrism, he was sentenced to house arrest (after a commuted sentence of prison), accused of heresy, and he was forbidden to publish works any more.
Galileo dared to look down the telescope. It is rumored that those that imprisoned him stuck to the traditional interpretations of I Chronicles 16:30 as the universe revolving around the earth, and not vice-versa, rather than take a look down the telescope themselves.

Galileo didn't invent the observation that the moons revolve around Jupiter, 'That they are what they are, don't blame him.' Isn't it better to know the truth, and then deal with the consequences, whatever they may be?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Music, practice, Springtime

I recently visited Tom's blog and read about his daughter playing piano in a competition. I wonder aloud, how does he do that?

I recently bought the Yamaha YPG-635 along with the Soft Mozart piano learning software and hooked it all up to try and teach my kids piano. At first it started working marvelously. The kids love Soft Mozart, and it really does get the learning notes and rhythms concept into them pretty good. What it can't do, is get them to practice everyday.

They were doing really, pretty well until springtime came. Now, when they get home, all they want to do is play outside. I just need them to practice for a little while to help them progress. Playing music stimulates parts of the brain that otherwise remain dormant. During moments of melancholy it can bring a soothing friend, during moments of elation, it can share with you. Music can be the place you can turn to when there is nobody else to turn to.

I want my kids to understand that, I think. But, I don't want to 'pressure' them into it, but rather help them enjoy it as I've enjoyed it. Also, learning a musical instrument brings all sorts of mastery and confidence. But not the type of false confidence so often encountered and encouraged through the PMA movement of schools today.

Musical mastery provides a real positive attitude, and a real sense of empowerment, creativity and self worth. Somehow, I must find ways to encourage my children to practice more. Any ideas? Send them my way!

Friday, April 17, 2009

Yes Judge, I know I saw the murderer with every fiber of my being

On my way home from work last night I started thinking a little bit about testimony meeting. Testimony is meant for ensuring others of the truth as witnesses see it. If you've ever been to a Mormon testimony meeting, you realize right away that the testimonies given there don't resemble the testimony given at a trial.

Imagine this witness stand scene on Law & Order:
Attorney: Where were you on the night of the 15th?
Witness: I was at church.
A: Did you see the accused stealing the car in the parking lot?
W: I testify with every fiber of my being that I saw the accused open up the door of the car and steal the car. He must be less-active.

After all, it is the testimony itself, the facts presented, along with the corroboration of other unrelated witnesses, that convince the Judge and the jury of the veracity of the testimony being given, it isn't whether the witness says, with every fiber of my being.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Creating a following

I've been writing this blog for several years now, and I've posted some of my scariest thoughts and experiences here, and you've shared with me. Many of you have written me personally through email, and many of you have dropped a comment on my posts. Thank you for your comments.
I have more to say and share in my intellectually honest, yet considerate manner that many of you have commented that you enjoy. Take a moment to 'follow' my blog and hear about my new experiences in the coming weeks such as trying to figure out how to drink coffee and make it taste good, discovering that I really like beer, and what beers I like, dealing with neighbors that would rather you don't exist.
You may not agree with me, you may not even like me anymore, but follow anyways. You're gonna learn a lot. Just click on the Follow this blog link on the side bar. To try and get things started, I'd like to offer the first follower some lunch. That is right! Lunch with me. And I don't like Wendy's.
Do you wish you could remain private, but still follow me? I understand your fears. You can drop me a line and I'll anonymously subscribe you.
Take care.

Meeting with Marlin K. Jensen, the Church's Historian

Several months ago on Jan. 27, 2009, I finally met with Marlin K. Jensen, the Church's Historian, to discuss some of the concerns I had with the church. I should have come home immediately to pen my thoughts, but I got busy with too much work. See my other post on how to lose thousands of dollars. My examples were not figurative. I really did lose more than $100K and it does really affect my free time.

I wasn't too surprised by the meeting really. Most of what I expected to happen, happened. Mr. Jensen invited us into his office at the church office building where he cordially greeted my wife and I. The first 1/2 hour or so of our meeting was spent building a relationship of trust. I recognized the pattern from serving a mission in Colombia. He told us about his family, showed us pictures, asked us about our family, etc. Unexpectedly though, as perhaps a show of good faith, he divulged that some of the members of his own family had faced similar disappointments and concerns related to Polygamy, but even more with relation to the Mountain Meadows Massacre. The latter event I had not gained any knowledgeable degree of familiarity until this meeting.

Mr. Jensen often returned to the topic of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, relating to me the recent not so flattering findings of the incident. I found him candid, open, and willing to share plenty on the topic, even though most of the information was quite negative toward the branch of the church established in Southern Utah at the time. At some time later, I must find my way to study this event in more detail.

As deeply informed about the Mountain Meadows Massacre as he was equaled the shallow depth of his knowledge surrounding my illegitimate lineage to Joseph Smith through Sylvia Porter Sessions and her daughter, Josephine Rosetta Lyon. See this post for a reminder of that discovery.

Mr. Jensen unaware of the allegation that Joseph Smith fathered a child with any other woman other than Emma Hale. He stated that there was just quite a bit that he, and the church in general didn't know about Mr. Smith. Looking back at the discussion, it seems more than trivial or coincidental that this area of Joseph's life is so secret, when he wrote, and rewrote such pivotal experiences such as the first vision so as to ensure he got it just right, but a doctrine so important as section 132, he would record so sparingly. Perhaps the Joseph Smith Papers will have more to tell.

Because of Mr. Jensen's sparse understanding surrounding that part of Mr. Smith's history, I did most of the talking. I related to him what I had learned surrounding Sylvia Porter Sessions, and the current efforts underway to secure DNA evidence to support her death-bed claims to her daughter. I told him about how I had made the discovery in the church history center at my stake center. He found the tale rather amusing and made a comment about the irony of how the church would send members to the church history center to strengthen their testimonies only to have those same testimonies degraded by work. I had to agree with him, because I have found the experience one of those experiences that I'm glad I had. In my life, it has been rare to encounter such living poetry, but as rare as it should be, I still remember with fondness, this experience at the church history center, my experience proselyting, and my Pearl of Great Price class.

After our brief discussion concerning these events, our time was drawing to a close. He apologized for starting late due to his busy schedule, but he wanted to relate something that he had discussed with now President Monson (or perhaps Mr. Maxwell) years back.

He related to me how at one time, he had received a letter from a member, asking for clarification concerning another piece of church history. He recalled extensive efforts by himself and others to research the claim, documenting everything they could find with the intention of clarifying the church's position. In the end, he produced a fairly lengthy and detailed report to discuss with the sender of the letter. Before presenting the document though, he brought the inquiring letter, and his response before Mr. Monson (or Mr. Maxwell) for approval.

The approval didn't come. Instead, he received a response something like what I'll try and represent here:
While there are certainly many events, doctrines, scriptures, writings, teachings, etc that may seem inconsistent, I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet because of my spiritual testimony that I have received concerning the Book of Mormon. Either the Book of Mormon is true and Joseph Smith is the prophet that brought the book, or the Book of Mormon is false, and Joseph Smith is a fraud.
Mr. Jensen then asked me if I had ever felt the spirit concerning the Book of Mormon. I replied that I felt sure that indeed, I had felt what those in the church describe as the spirit of God testifying to me through the Holy Ghost that the Book of Mormon is true.
I then continued to explain to him why I now used great caution with my feelings. I explained that although I had felt the Book of Mormon to be true, I have also had identical feelings about other things in my life, and then found them to be false. I related Joseph Smith and the Pearl of Great Price as an example, along with mention of certain other life experiences. I also related how it was interesting to me how all God seeking religions counted on identical spiritual witnesses to validate their own beliefs, including Evangelical Christians, Catholics, Muslims, etc. Members of each of these religions relate their own spiritual testimonies of the validity of their own prophets through study, personal reflection, prayer, etc. Which is more likely, that only one of these churches is indeed divine and chosen of some supreme being, or that all of them believe their church to be divine, but none actually are.
Mr. Jensen kindly acknowledged the dilemma, offering the statement that he would have to be pretty arrogant to insist that his testimony based on feelings were more valid than that of another human being with different beliefs, but that he felt confident it was so.
"And what of these obvious incongruities surrounding Mr. Smith?" I asked.
"I am willing to defer my judgment until I can ask God Himself." He replied.

With that, our time was over, but Mr. Jensen offered his services again should we ever want it. He offered to be our 'friend in court' as it were.
My overall opinion of Mr. Jensen is that his demeanor is sincere, but his desire to know the truth has been suppressed, deferring it until after death, a time when conveniently enough, he won't be able to tell any of the rest of us his results, nor when, if he is wrong, and the Muslims actually got it right, it will be too late to actually do anything about it.

I'm reminded of a tale of the philosopher Socrates about how he was lecturing to a group of students around a body of water. One of the students posed a question to Socrates, "When, great teacher, do I know when I am truly seeking knowledge." Without answering the student Socrates got up and walked over to him, he then pushed the students head underwater and when the student finally tried pushing up for air Socrates let him go. When the student had collected his composure Socrates said to him, "when you desire knowledge as desperately as you were desiring air to breathe you know you are truly seeking knowledge."

I believe that those content to defer their judgment concerning Mr. Smith until after death are not truly seeking knowledge.

I'm not convinced that I am truly seeking knowledge as this student sought air either, but I'm not content to defer.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

The origin of moral values

While compiling today, I read an interesting question from a comment on Michael Shermers blog:

Dinesh says Christianity gave us our values. I think people gave Christianity it’s values.

hat a wonderful and provacative question. Could we humans have obtained our values but for Christ?

I love the idea that many of the values we have could have been obtained by humans, and claimed by Christianity.